to hear someone say that they were told they are too nice makes me sick. how in the world can someone be too nice? that is like saying mother theresa did too much. there is, however, such a thing as being excessively unappreciative, cruel and selfish. no one appreciates anything anymore; a great boyfriend, a best friend, a parent, loyalty, generosity. the world lacks compassion, love and peace because people don’t see the value in niceness. the hardest thing in life i’ve learned to accept is that some people do not appreciate. it doesn’t matter how good your intentions are, how hard you try to be the best person you can for yourself and others or how much you just try to be nice, there will always be someone to throw it in your face and not appreciate or acknowledge it one bit. That person will feel terrible, but it won’t stop them from doing it to the next person. the idea of being too nice is ridiculous and nonsensical and stupidity like this is poison to our world…
“All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.”—Anatole France (via misswallflower)
I never realized how easy it is to help people when you, yourself don’t need anything or any help. The reason that people need help is because they don’t have money to live at acceptable standards, and its unfortunate that the only way to make a real impact in those peoples lives is to live well beyond those acceptable standards. Not to say that any help one can give without money isn’t useful, but the real struggle in this world is poverty. We like to deny that money brings happiness, but if we exam the root of all REAL problems, we are likely to find that money will solve it. This isn’t to say that people can’t be happy without money, but money does bring satisfaction by alleviating many worries. Kudos to those who have much to spare, but a sincere appreciation for those who, indeed, have none.
The Prophet The prophet is the type of person that calls us on any misguided attempts at something, makes us accountable for our behavior, and prompts us to be honest, even when that is not easy. The prophet challenges us, and can be a royal pain at times, but ultimately helps us to find freedom. Prophets point! They point to the fact that it doesn’t matter whether pleasure or pain is involved, the only thing that matters is that we seek to see and live ‘the truth’ because only it will set us free.
The Cheerleader To balance out the provocation and questioning of a prophet, a person also must have a few cheerleader friends: folks who offer unconditional love, support, and acceptance. We need the encouragement of the cheerleader as much as the criticism and feedback of the prophet because burnout is always around the corner when we don’t have people who are ready to encourage us, see our gifts clearly, and be there for us when our involvement with people, their sometimes unrealistic demands, and our own crazy expectations for ourselves threaten to pull us down.
The Harasser After we’ve been criticized and loved, we need to laugh. That’s why we need harassers, the third kind of friend, who helps us to see the humor in life’s frustrations and calamities. They help us to mock our unrealistic expectations, of ourselves and of others. This type of friend helps us regain and maintain perspective.
The Guide And finally, we need guides. Listeners. People who will search and look for nuances in what we share with them to help us to uncover some of the ‘voices’ that are unconsciously guiding our lives, especially the ones that make us hesitant, anxious, fearful, and willful.